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It's been awhile since I wrote on this, primarily due to exam period: I have essay after essay due, and an oral exam that promises to be awful (history of the low countries).

I leave soon. Every moment feels deserving of long, slow savoring, but I feel like I don't even have time to chew. (that's a convoluted metaphor, I know. I can smooth it out.) What a year. I can't even believe it's happened--I don't even feel like I was present for all of it, as if someone else was operating for me in first semester, like the little alien inside of the man's head in Men In Black. But I suppose I was here, after all.

To spend a year with this much novelty, this much adventure, good friends, time for myself, personal growth, etc., this is not realistic. Like my mom wrote to me once, 'you can't live this fairy-tale of a life forever. You must learn a trade.' (I don't know what she intended by telling me I have to learn a trade. Perhaps she envisions me fixing old furniture or becoming an electrician after college; I wouldn't mind that, to be honest.) Now that my fairy-tale life is coming to its end, I can't help but reflect. Cliche, but inevitable.

I had things that bothered me, sure: the adjustment to living far from home; a promising relationship that went from full-speed-ahead to zip in 3 weeks; acclimation to Belgium's funky academic system; a baby-sitting job (my first) that I despised; being powerless to help my family out in the rough times they had this year.

On the whole, though, the year saw me make a lot of transformations. I would like to think up stories to illustrate these, as that would be more articulate than me trying to explain them. A list of phrases that I need to find stories to match:

1) Becoming more generous/not worrying about money

3) Getting over my first boyfriend completely

4) Getting clarity on my true passions (cooking, story-telling, writing)

5) Traveling a lot, but not necessarily absorbing the culture; knowing I want to live in different places

6) Losing all concern with status (academically, socially, etc.)

Home In A Box La Sopa Cubana

I know there's more things. I know there's so much that's changed, that's shifted slightly about me, I'm never going to remember it all or find the adequate words. But it's worth the effort I'm sure. People will be sick of my Belgium stories. I never know who writing is for though. Kinda like this blog. I don't know if anyone other than me reads it (and my Spaniards, from time to time).

Homeinaboxlasopa